Learnt a lesson again !!!

Ya !! i did
yesterday.. i thought, i learnt a new lesson, and today it was officially confirmed!!

And the moral of the story/lesson was, " DAMIT !!! U HAVE TO AND FOR SURE HAVE TO BE PRETENTIOUS IN FROUNT OF EVERYONE... mind u EVERYONE. !! "
there is noone as a good friend... as Mother,as father... am not saying any thing for my Bro, as till date he is wid me!! but still dont have any exceptation.
To be frank.. i dont carry any false notion of excepting things from poeple...
but, fortunately or unfortunately,(iam still confused), at times you meet such people in life and at such a juncture wen u need s'one to be nxt to you and u come close...
i think the same happened wid me,last week.. and how stupid of me, i again forgot, I DONT DESERVE it, Absolutely not...

Till the time you r coochi-coochi wid the person..he is there wid you, but even if by mistake you start to share things or send him a signal that you might call for a commitment, phissss !!! he is gone... gone wid the wind...
I knw its not the problem wid the person there, its all here wid me...the me which is hidden, and for many people its unexplored!! it think i shud now except the fact no one can take the real ME, who might be too raw to be sweet.. ya Damit i abuse, abuse a lot,but tat doesnt mean i dont respect me elders and atleast am not pretentious like other gals woh act like vry decent ones and actually are not!! ...
If i keep my Gmail tag line to be- Nobody Dies Virgin, Life F***s us All.. tat doesnt mean am a characterless gal!! or wat ever.. i just fail to u'stand this psyche.

And as wat i have learnt frm last week.. will make sure from now no more truth teller,the hidden and unexplored me will be wid me only, be it anyone.. YA ANYONE....

You know(dont knw who is YOU here, but didnt get any other word to start the sentence, neways,) Since the day i have decided to settle down, am facing such an absurd and irritating situations that the whole idea to look for a perfect partner or infact just a partner wud do for me ... (cos rest i knw i can take care off (:P)), giving me such an set bck that its has now made me re-think on my decision...

The first was the ASSh*** from Kolkatta, bloody jerk...

than I find s'one who absolutely DHAKKAN(in my lang), to whom i cant stand for a even a sec,so just forget abt spending the life time ... HUH

i forgot to mention about, Another specimen, to whom my sweet dad gave my no... has only to boast abt him self and keeps on givin GYAN to me... how to reduce weight, wat i shud do in my life, wat time to get up... wat time to sleep.. and ya not to forget he calls my dad "PAPAJi",after all this, am just waiting to listen my kids names !!!(frm his perspective OUR) AH!!! give me a space damit.......

than wid whom i get comfy, he wants to have close relationship, to know me better(its just a decent way to say,"lets have sex baby")and i start wondering to how many gals he must be sharing such "CLOSE TALKS". which again puts me off... i want to make guys knw.. there is life beyond Sex...
Out of the lot i did like one person... but again forgot, he was no different from the rest...

So now time for some vry open CONFESSIONS,(infact they are not confessions exactly, they are ME absolutely ME)
So here it goes....

• I have Boozed n Fagged
• I Abuse..and abuse badly...
• I cant take ingorance
• I dont wanna hide anything frm anyone,but i think i'll have to as noone u'stands
• I did had an affair....
• I dont want the other person to lie wid me, even if he doesnt like any thing abt me plz plz tell me straight away

Apart from all this- I know how to respect my elders, mind you wat iam wid my family am not like wid e'one...
I knw how to handle my professional and personal life together ...

i dont knw why am doing this, plz dont take it to b a advertisement of mine... for a perfect marraige material, but all wat i mean to say is .. "ALL WAT U SEE OR PERCIEVE IS NOT CORRECT,IF AT TIMES U GO OR DO WRONG, IT CUD BE ONCE SITUATION OR MENTAL STATE, WHICH HAS MADE HIM/HER TO DO DO.!! "(This is wat i believe)

So before coming to any conclusion, keep ur self in others shoe and try to think why that person had to do that ... and if u were at that persons place in same situation how u wud have reacted, if u wudnt have done the same than u have the right to disagree...

I think i sud stop it now cos now my hed will break into pieces out of pain..but feeling better... few things which i had to say i have said...