Thursday, September 21

Amazing One Liners

There is not much work for me in the office Today.. so started searchin some funny One-lines got some really good ones so thought sharing with e'one here :

A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

A day without sunshine is like, night.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

Always try to be modest and be proud of it!

For All the drinkers ---

Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill
your drink.

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.


Try this :

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of Loan payments

It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole

Join the Army, meet interesting people, and kill them.

Keep honking. I'm reloading.

Learn from your parents' mistakes: use birth control.

Multitasking means screwing up several things at once

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire.

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional
to the ability to reach it.

The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

For Marketin Executives:
If you can't convince them, confuse them.

Corporate Gyan:
When you don't know what you are doing, do it neatly.

Point to Ponder :
What is a free gift? Aren't all gifts free?

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.

jeevan ka gyaan....

Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".

If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong...

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